It's been another crazy week in the world. In the past 48 hours, we have been bombarded with images from the terrorist attacks in India. When I first heard of the attacks, I said, "India? Who attacks India? They aren't out to hurt anybody!" Now they are left to pick up the pieces of their own horrific 9/11-style disaster.
Several of my family members woke themselves up at 3:30am Friday to head for the stores. (I chose to sleep in and experience their foolishness vicariously.) I heard of traffic, congested parking lots and people packed shoulder-to-shoulder inside stores. At one point, my wife was stuck in such a cluster of humanity that it nearly triggered an anxiety attack, sending her on a mission to get out the door. One of their stops was Wal-Mart - we learned later in the day that a person had been trampled to death at a Wal-Mart in New York.
Giants star wide receiver Plaxico Burress "accidentally shot himself" in the thigh at a New York nightclub last night. Details are forthcoming. Are you kidding me?
And finally, I just read in the New York Times that a company called Atlas Sports Genetics has developed a genetic test that they believe can predict how athletic your child may be. For $149, you can have little Johnny's DNA tested for variants of a specific gene found in a large percentage of 429 elite athletes Atlas studied - 50 of which were Olympians.
Holy cow. I just don't get it, but then again I don't think I'm supposed to get it. What has happend to common sense? Lori Borgman is a columnist for the Indianapolis Star. She wrote this piece, first published on March 15, 1998. Circulated widely on the Internet since then, it's a classic:
Common Sense lived a long life but died in the United States from heart failure on the brink of the new millennium. No one really knows how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He selflessly devoted his life to service in schools, hospitals, homes and factories, and helping folks get jobs done without fanfare and foolishness. For decades, petty rules, silly laws, and frivolous lawsuits held no power over Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating such valued lessons as to know when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, and that life isn't always fair.
Common Sense lived by simple credos: sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not the kids), and winning isn't everything (it's okay to come in second).
A veteran of the Industrial Revolution, the Great Depression, and the Technological Revolution, Common Sense survived trends including body piercing, whole language, and "new math." But his health declined when he became infected with the "If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-worth-it" virus. In recent decades his waning strength proved no match for the ravages of well intentioned but overbearing regulations. He watched in pain as good people became ruled by self-seeking lawyers. His health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented zero-tolerance policies.
Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for taking a swig of mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student only worsened his condition. It declined even further when schools had to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student but could not inform the parent when a female student was pregnant or wanted an abortion.
Finally, Common Sense lost his will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, criminals received better treatment than victims, and federal judges stuck their noses in everything from the Boy Scouts to professional sports. Finally, when a woman, too stupid to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, was awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw in the towel.
As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic but was kept informed of developments regarding questionable regulations such as those for low flow toilets, rocking chairs, and stepladders. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers and a stepsister: My Rights, Only Me and Ima Whiner.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
